”“For fuck’s sake, this is not a business arrangement. I want you to make love to me. I want it to start when you find it comfortable to do so.�...�“Come here.”“What?”“I said come here.”She sheepishly moved across to me. For someone who had just told me she wanted to have sex with me, she appeared very shy when it came to actually doing it.“Kiss me.”“I want sex. I didn’t expect to kiss you.”“I don’t do sex. I do love. If you are not willing to make love to me then we are wasting our time.”She was. I was never able to do that. For me, sleep was difficult to come by. It was only achieved after total exhaustion, and even then it was the semi-sleep suffered by those of us with guilty conscience, or a heavy agenda the next day. I had heard that there were some recruits that might start to sleepwalk as the pressure of boot camp mounted. Over the next several weeks Sam Leonard did everything in his power to push me over the edge. He never put himself in a position to be placed on report, but. He never complained, and he convinced himself that he was content with his life.He was astonished one morning when the pretty girl that he admired so much stopped by his easel and studied his half-completed seascape. Immersed as he was in his work, she startled him when she spoke: “That’s a beautiful painting, sir,” she stated softly. He turned toward her, and jumped slightly when he realized it was she who spoke such kind words to him. “Thank you,” he replied weakly. He could feel himself. But the payoff was much higher; and it definitely WOULD be much higher for me, with my awareness of coming events and their effects on commodities prices.I had just never had the balls to do this previously. Now I felt quite a bit more confident in pulling off this risky venture. And it was exhilarating, when I thought about it. Just imagine--Louis 'No-Risk' Chandler now playing in the big leagues, financially!Thus, the second thing I did that first morning 'back' was to initiate contact over.
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