(After a moment, Myrtle turns to Mortimer)Myrtle: I’m still trying to recall where we’ve met. Now let me ask you something and I hope you won’t ...hink it’s too personal.Mortimer: Go right ahead. I won’t think it’s too personal.Myrtle: Are you married?Mortimer: Yes, I am married to a wonderful woman, a lovely woman. Are you married?Myrtle: Yes, I am happily married to a wonderful man and we have two wonderful children.Mortimer: How nice. What are the names of your children?Myrtle: We have a. With a shriek that reminded me of some of my worst times with my first wife, she tore into me, spittle flying everywhere.“You stupid motherfucker. You have busted every one of my Goddamned cookies. You don’t have the sense of...”I tuned her out the same way I had survived Harpy #1 and vowed to never again answer the door when the witches were flying.✧ ✧ ✧Say thanks to mixerman478 ‎for this one.Q: What does the devil have between his legs?A: He has great balls of fire.Q: Why can’t the ghost have. That was my first time. Once we did it the first time that was the start we played about with each other for about three or four months after that, then it stopped for some time. I was just coming up to fifteen, my breasts were getting bigger and fuller and I just started to shave my pussy, never liked hair down there. One day I came home and found a bottle of vodka in the cabinet and thought I try a drink. I had four glasses of vodka with coke and took the last one up to my room, I sat on. Both my parents want to get to know you. I think he’s probably in the living room.”Carter looked around and saw Ted sitting in a chair near a bookcase loaded with books. He looked up from his reading. “Oh, hi Carter.”“What are you reading?” Carter asked.“The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich,” Ted replied. “With all the neo-nazis popping up I thought it would be interesting to know their backstory. Carter — I want to apologize for my remarks in the car. It’s nothing personal. I’m just a bit.
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