That they would tell me what the hell was going on… that she was fine. That this was all a big misunderstanding…I spent the third hour hoping my p...one wouldn’t ring… I was sure if it did ring it would be someone on the other end telling me that she had died. Telling me that I had been too late. Telling me that she had left without me being able to at least tell her goodbye. That she had died without me being able to tell her how much she had meant to me. That I had missed my opportunity to. I saw Febe role her eyes up and shake her head at times but she was smiling and loving the attention.I was by the BBQ making last minute additions when Febe came up to me. “Luciana didn’t have a date for the party so I said she could dance with you if that’s OK?” said Febe. “No problem, she’s a nice girl and has a hot body; I’ll make sure to give her a good time.” I said. Febe laughed and punched me in the arm. The guys hung around the food table tucking into the finger food while the girls. I lay there for several minutes absorbing the pain, realising my cunt had become sexually wet again, and hating myself for it. I felt a sharp sting in my armpit, the bruised tender flesh being pinched into a fold, then a more powerful bite as an alligator clip was attached to the fold, then another, and another, I kept count in my wet gooey darkness, it was all I could do for myself, I felt so helpless. Before it stopped, I had counted twelve of those clips, their grip was sharp and painful but. Oh God I thought I better go. I walkedup on to the stage trying not to trip in my heels and felt like everyone waslaughing at me.My heart was racing; then the music started. The girls started dancing so Istarted swaying from side to side and moving my arms and doing the odd twirllike the others. I mimed the words to the songs. I accidentally rested myhands on my chest for a few seconds and all the men starting cheeringincluding Robert and Pete. This was the most humiliating feeling I've had.
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